Monkeys and Memories
First things first...Johanna won my leftover Walking on the Wild Tide contest and the yarn and a little something else are winging their way to Canada. Second, I finished my Monkeys!

Yarn: Mediumweight Socks That Rock in Blue Brick Wall
Needle: Inox 2.5mm Magic Loop style
Started: 5/17/07 Completed: 5/25/07
Today has become a rather introspective day for me. While still in my morning lounge wear (read: t-shirt and Target sleep pants) I read two articles on The Gate that propelled me down memory lane. The first was a rundown of the Monaco Grand Prix results, the second the Cannes Film Festival award winners. I looked down and realized this was the T-shirt I had on:

I started to realize that travel during the months of April and May is a recurring theme in my life--1994 found me in Singapore/Malaysia/Thailand/Vietnam, 1995 was France/Spain/Monaco/Italy, 1997 a return to Italy, 2002 Japan/Thailand/Cambodia.
From a practical standpoint, April and May are 'shoulder seasons' when travel may be a bit less expensive, but for me it was more about starting new chapters of life. Leaving the country, I often felt lost, aimless, unsure of what direction I wanted my life to take. Each time I returned stateside with a renewed sense of self and a confidence about what lie ahead.
As May 2007 comes to a close I find myself floundering once again. If I were single and childless, I know what I would do--grab my passport, backpack and a Lonely Planets guide to somewhere. I am not saying I wish I were single and childless, as my husband and son mean more to me that anything else in the world and enrich my life in countless ways. But I struggle with finding a way to capture that confidence, take a quantum leap forward, overcome the aimless uncertainty. Travel made it easy because of the giant step outside of Me, the Me defined by my day-to-day life in the USofA. Just days in a row of self-discovery through meeting new people and new challenges, discovering amazing works of art in world class museums or climbing ruins in Cambodia, bungee jumping or finding a public bathroom. Everything I "own" for the moment fits in my backpack and has a use. Each day is new and different. I gain perspective on who I was when I left, what I have discovered about myself while away, where I see myself headed. At some point, the desire to return and start fresh hits. Not a feeling of being homesick, but an excitement about stepping back into Me albeit a changed Me, a fresh Me.
The challenge for me is how to accomplish something similar within the context of wife, mother, inability to take 1-5 months off to travel alone....?
Labels: FO, Self-indulgence, Travel